LIFE'S A GRIND-5

LIFE'S A GRIND-5

Jack Scribe
  
The usual disclaimers apply.  If for some legal reason you shouldn't read 
this...don't.
  
  
A special acknowledgement to Drew for encouraging me to tell a better 
story through his edits and suggestions. And a big thanks to Brad for his 
patient proofreading and editing. Finally, a shout-out to Trab for the final 
tweaks to get the story 'just right.'
  
Comments are appreciated at jack.scribe@gmail.com. 
  
__________________________
 
  
Chapter 5, PART TIME OPPORTUNITIES
 
Sunday morning turned out to be a repeat performance of seven hours 
earlier for the two guys. Robert and Jeremy talked a little about their 
intimate actions in bed after Ty and Manny left. Neither felt remorse or 
guilt; it was as if a shroud of denial had been lifted. But denial of what? 
They decided to have further discussions the following weekend; the 
elder Steins would again be out of town. Both young men knew they had 
taken a big step toward defining themselves as adults.
 
It was the final school week before Christmas break and Jeremy moved 
the self-analysis into a holding pattern until he could seek advice. The 
admission that he had thoroughly enjoyed the physical contact with his 
old friend - retracing forgotten familiarities between two hormone-
charged, pleasure-seeking young males - was a major revelation. 
However, Jeremy knew that it was more than just 'getting his rocks off'. 
 
The emotional implications triggered a conscious realization of how he 
really observed other men in everyday life: those images - however lustful 
- had fueled a subconscious fantasy.  A backside view of firm buns as a 
guy walked in front of him; tight denim jeans molded to an ample crotch – 
if commando, all the better; sleeveless-tees that accented muscular biceps 
and revealed a wisp of underarm hair; taut six-packs and treasure trails at 
the beach. These subtle turn-ons became more pronounced at the gym.
 The jackpot, he now realized, was the locker room or shower area. An
 attractive mix of guys in varying degrees of undress was very stimulating. 
 
On the other hand, Jeremy really enjoyed girls in his life. 'Well, maybe I 
should think of them as women,' he considered. 'I'm officially an adult in 
five weeks.' He had experienced the joys and frustrations of having a 
steady relationship - none ever more than a couple of months - with 
several female classmates over the past few years. Except for a couple of 
them, Jeremy had been sexually active with all. 'And only one virgin in the 
bunch.' He wasn't ready to dismiss them as just a piece of ass - that 
would be impolite. But, he decided, it was probably a way of exerting his 
male 'hunter instinct' role in a form of coupling that was socially 
acceptable to his peers.
 
Then there was the issue with the mystery man now identified as Garin 
McManus. 'What the hell is Big Smiles, Ltd.?' Jeremy wondered as he 
pulled the uniform shirt over his freshly showered torso. 'Guess that's 
sumpin I'll find out at our dinner meeting tonight.' The clock indicated that 
he still had 15 minutes before check-in time. As Jeremy made his way 
back into the gym he hoped that Zach would have time for a quick chat. 
 
Monday was a little busier than usual. Gio was on the floor with a client 
but Zach was absent. Jeremy's disappointment faded when he found the 
blond trainer at a side desk reading some sort of manual. "Zach, gotta 
minute?" Jeremy said loudly as he walked over to the trainer. 'Wonder if 
those guys got their problems settled?'
 
"Actually, no. I've got to renew my A.C.E. certification on-line. I was just 
about ready to go to the site. Whazzup? You look like you're carrying the 
burden of the universe on your shoulders."
 
"Just some personal stuff that I need some advice on. I hope you don't 
mind if I suck you into my earth-shaking problems?" Jeremy said with a 
grin. "Maybe bend your ear for about an hour some day this week? I'd 
really appreciate some big brother advice."
 
"I'm honored...little bro. How about tonight?"
 
"Naw...got plans that I can't skip out on. Could we meet before my shift 
tomorrow?"
 
"Let me check the appointment log." Zach opened the dog-eared binder 
and looked at the schedule. "Hmmm, how about four? I've got a session 
that'll end about that time and don't have anything else going until 5:30."
 
"Cool. How about downstairs at EatZi's?"
 
"I'll block out the time right now and see ya then." Zach stood and 
extended his hand.
 
Jeremy shook hands and proceeded to the front desk. He went through 
the sign-in procedures and shared a few jokes with Pete when not taking 
care of members, telephones or walk-ins. His working partner's blatant 
flirting and gay overtones took on a new meaning. Whenever Pete would 
lob a wisecrack with a double entendre, Jeremy turned it around and 
slammed it right back with new spins. 'Wow, this is kinda fun,' he 
thought. 'Just wicked enough to be dangerous.'
 
"Dahlin', you're just a laugh-riot a minute tonight. Where is this new, 
liberated personality coming from?" Pete said after he checked in a 
member. "And where has it been hiding?"
 
"I decided it works both ways. You can't have all the fun." Jeremy almost 
added 'girlfriend' as he had heard his uncles 'camp' on occasion but 
decided that was just too much. He was content to only poke his toe into 
the gay waters at this point. 'And exaggerated camp is not who I am.' 
 
"Whatever has happened...I'm enjoying the new Jeremy Sloan. A likeable 
stud who has a terrific sense of humor. I think..." Pete stopped when he 
noticed Jeremy was looking at someone who had walked up to the desk.
 
"Good evening, Garin," Jeremy said as he took the card to swipe. 'This 
guy is hot,' he thought, not sure if this was being gay or just reacting to the 
facts of life - Gavin was very handsome.
 
"Hi, Jeremy." Garin grinned and nodded to Pete.
 
"Pete, do you know Garin...McManus?" Jeremy smiled and handed back 
the membership card. 'Naw, hot is not the proper description. Awesome, 
maybe.'
 
"Ah...sure. Hi, Garin. Have a good workout." The greeting was right out 
of the front desk manual along with a smile and eye contact.
 
"You still up for some dinner?"
 
"Sure. I've got an appetite that's ready for some chow," Jeremy replied 
with a grin. 
 
"Great. I'll meet you in front at 9:00 p.m. and we can go from there."
 
"Pete, do you mind if I bug out fifteen minutes early so I can change 
clothes?" Jeremy looked at his watch and noticed it was only seven.
 
"It'll be pretty slow tonight later on. Have a blast." Pete shrugged and 
rolled his eyes so only Jeremy could see.
 
"Then nine is fine. I'll be there." 
 
"Look for a black Navigator in the loading zone. See ya then." Garin 
waved at the two men and walked into the gym towards the locker room.
 
"Well, isn't that interesting?" Pete said with his hands gesturing with 
exaggeration. "What's that all about?"
 
"A guy I know who wants to buy a poor, starving student some dinner. 
That's all."
 
"And is absolutely gorgeous. Man, what a waste...two fabulous straight 
men going out. Where do I stand in line and get a number?" Pete asked 
with a snicker.
 
"Sorry to disappoint you, sir. We're...friends. End of story. Sorry for no 
juicy stuff to tantalize your bones."
 
"There's only one bone that needs..."
 
"TMI. Don't even go there...that's your problem," Jeremy said with a 
chuckle. "But I have it on good authority that if you're horny, wrap a hand 
around your..."
 
"Yeah, yeah. Got the picture. Looks like I work the streets...again." Pete 
looked at the computer screen and added, "But if Mr. Garin J. McManus 
wants a little action, give him my name." Pete puckered his lips and blew 
Jeremy a kiss.
 
"Get your dick cut off and add some tits...then he might be interested." 
Jeremy slapped Pete on the back before he grabbed the ringing 
telephone.
 
The next hour and a half moved by fairly smoothly. There was just 
enough traffic to keep the two guys active without being pushed. By 8:45 
p.m., Jeremy was more than ready to get back to the locker room and 
change for dinner. He had dressed in khakis and a sweater that morning 
rather than jeans in anticipation of his evening meeting. It was just a 
matter of getting out of the uniform, brushing his teeth, putting on clean 
briefs and changing back into his street clothes. Ten minutes later, with 
backpack in hand, he closed his locker and dashed through the gym to 
the entrance. He waved to Pete and beat a hasty retreat down to the 
Clark Street entrance. As promised, a shiny, black SUV with flashing 
lights was waiting at the curb. Once Jeremy verified that it was Garin – 
difficult due to the dark, tinted windows - he opened the passenger door, 
slid onto the black leather seats and engaged the safety belts.
 
"A man of his word," Garin said. "Right on time."
 
"A man who is very curious about this part-time job opportunity.
 Whazzup?"
 
"All in good time. Let's get to the restaurant, first." Garin turned off the 
flashing emergency lights, made sure traffic was clear and turned into the 
street. "Are you up for fondue?"
 
"Fondue? Um, I don't think I know what it is."
 
"A pot with hot oil is brought to your table and various things can be 
cooked in it. I was thinking of cheese fondue. In moderation, it's not too 
filling. The restaurant - Geja's - is not too far from where you live or here. 
It's just off Clark on Armitage."
 
"Geja's? Jeez, I've walked by that place since I was a kid. Never been 
there, though."
 
"Wanna try it? At this hour I don't want too much...unless you're really 
starved."
 
"I'm game. And I had a pretty big lunch. Let's do it." Jeremy thought that 
even with the illumination from the dashboard and the streetlights, Gavin 
was really something in the eye candy department. 'He's really pulled 
together for an older guy. This dude must be at least 26 or so.' 
 
In less than five minutes, they turned onto Armitage and found street 
parking about a block away. They walked back to the small restaurant 
and entered the foyer. Gavin took off his coat, motioned for Jeremy to do 
the same and gave the two coats to the coat check lady. 
 
"Hi. My name's McManus and I called for a reservation...although it 
looks pretty quiet tonight," he said to the host. "Could we have a table 
somewhere so we can talk?"
 
"Yes, Sir, Mr. McManus. Follow me. I've got a great corner where you 
won't be disturbed."
 
"If you would, just bring over a glass of house merlot and a coke, please. 
I already know we'll have the cheese fondue for two."
 
"A man of decision. I'll give the order to your server and tell him not to 
bother you." The host walked away as the two young men sat down.
 
"Next time, when we're not rushed, I'll take you to Morton's or Gibson's 
for a thick strip steak."
 
"Rain check, then?" Jeremy asked as he shifted slightly in the chair. 'Next 
time? Wow.'
 
"Yeah, sometime when neither of us have to work. First, let me tell you a 
little about myself. You know the name...came up here ten years ago 
from Indianapolis and have a BA degree from DePaul. Got involved in a 
small business while I was in school and became a partner five years ago. 
Turned 28 a couple of months ago and still single...although I've got one 
gal that might be good for the long haul. I don't know...we'll see. But I 
don't mind checking out a different lady once in a while if something tasty 
comes along, if you get my drift."
 
"The drift sounds like you've got the best of both worlds." Jeremy said. 
'This guy must be a real player.'
 
"Maybe for right now. But by 30 I'd like to be settled down. Now give 
me the 30 second thumbnail brief on Jeremy Sloan."
 
"Mom and an older sister...my dad I never knew. My mother is disabled 
because of an injury and my sister and I look after her. She's not bed-
ridden or anything but needs assistance...Sis and I help with the 
expenses. Naomi, my sister, is in nursing school at Loyola. Uncle Win – 
Mom's brother - really was my guiding light. I get good grades and plan 
on going to DePaul on a scholarship. No steady girlfriends right now. 
And...well, that's about it."
 
"That's good. Now, what questions do you have that you're dying to 
ask?" Garin smiled and looked intently into Jeremy's eyes.
 
"Big Smiles? That's the name of your business? I did a Google search but 
didn't come up with anything," Jeremy said. 
 
The server brought the drinks, fondue pot, metal skewers and a platter of 
all the ingredients. He lit the flame under the pot and asked if he needed 
to explain the process.
 
"Not at all. I'll make sure that the fondue is heated properly," Garin 
replied. "Just keep an eye on the table so if we need you, I can flag you 
down. We need some privacy."
 
"I understand," the server replied with a grin as he walked away.
 
"We sent him a mixed message. From his expression, I suspect he thinks 
I'm giving you an engagement ring, or something...whatever guys do." 
Garin said with a laugh. "Not that I would object if I was wired that way."
 
"Yeah, different strokes." Jeremy just smiled and thought about wiring. 
"Just for the record, my uncle and his partner - um, they're both gone – 
kinda raised me. So I'm pretty cool with a person's sexuality."
 
"It's good to have an open mind. This company I'm involved with is 
almost exclusively staffed with men and more than a few are gay. End of 
discussion on that topic." Garin lifted the cheese and carefully put the 
contents into the fondue pot. "Big Smiles is not in the public's knowledge 
because our operating name is well known and I don't like to flag it 
around."
 
"Well known? I don't understand." Jeremy looked at Garin with a raised 
eyebrow.
 
"The company is an entertainment enterprise that goes by the name of the 
Studz Barecats. We're a group of male dancers who perform primarily 
for audiences of women. Are you familiar with the name?"
 
"Sort of a Chippendale's type group?" Jeremy replied. He had seen a 
documentary about the Chippendale's on PBS a couple of years ago and 
had heard the Studz Barecats name mentioned...usually with a snicker 
and a smirk. "Some of the girls at school have mentioned your group. I 
think maybe their moms or older sisters had seen your, 
ah...show.  You're a..."
 
"Dancer? Yep...Mac the Knife." Garin adjusted the flame, added the 
carafe of wine to the cheese and took a skewer to stir the ingredients. 
"That's my stage name and I do a light 'leather' routine. The other guys 
play a cop, construction worker, fireman, football player...you get the 
idea. It's all fun fantasy.  We perform primarily on Friday through Sunday 
and do private parties during the week. There's some heavy-duty money 
with the private parties."
 
"You strip down to...nothing?" Jeremy looked at the fondue pot and saw 
the cheese change from a simmer to the point of bubbling.
 
"Not nothing. That's against the law...and we are law-abiding and tax-
paying gentlemen." Garin adjusted the flame a little lower and said, 
"Watch me with the bread and do the same thing. Just remember that the 
cheese is awfully hot so be careful. He speared a French bread cube with 
his skewer and swirled the bread around in the cheese. Garin smiled as 
he took the saturated bread out of the pot, allowed the excess to drip 
and slowly brought the morsel to his lips. "Yeah, this smells great." He 
took the slightly cooled cheese-dipped bread into his mouth and chewed 
away. "Your turn. And have some fruit with it."
 
Jeremy mimicked all of Gavin's moves and enjoyed the first bite of 
cheese fondue. "This is delicious." He picked up a slice of apple and 
chewed the combination of hot cheese and chilled fruit. "Really beats a 
Big Mac."
 
"I thought you'd like it." Gavin took a few more bites and continued, "Let 
me give you a rundown of how we operate. We play characters, have 
costumes and use stage names...I told you mine. On the weekend shows, 
we start out with everyone in the same tear-away shirt and pants."
 
"Tear-away?"
 
"To the audience's eye, we look like guys in conventional clothing. 
However, as the music and dancing heat up, the shirt...and, later, the 
pants are easily pulled off because they're held together just by small 
Velcro connections."
 
"I see. Then you're dancing in your underwear?"
 
"Well, sort of. After the pants come off...and the shoes...we're on the 
stage for the next song in boxers. Velcro also holds them together. At the 
final moment of the music, we pull off the tear-away underwear and end 
the dance in very brief flesh-colored thongs. Before the audience knows 
what happened, the lights go down and we get off the stage."
 
"Um, the thongs. They don't show your...dick or anything?"
 
"Jeremy, I'd be lying if I didn't admit that the pouch of the thong is pretty 
form-fitting and the fabric is thin. But that's all it is...just a tease. One thing 
that makes you an ideal candidate for the Studz Barecats is your 
endowment," Garin said with a grin before dunking another cube of bread 
into the cheese. "I know you're aware that I was checking you out in the 
shower...but it was just business. In our business, size matters."
 
"Aw, shucks, Mr. McManus. I thought you were looking for a 
boyfriend." Jeremy laughed and speared another piece of bread. 'Maybe 
Uncle Win was right about the family genes,' he thought while he 
imagined Garin stripping down to a tight thong. 'But is this something I 
want to do?'
 
"I'd say, Mr. Sloan, that not only are you good looking and hung, but 
you're smart with a sense of humor. The trick is to parlay all the assets to 
entertain the audience."
 
"I've never danced much. Well, I've goofed around in the bedroom like 
Tom Cruise did in that movie."
 
"I think every red-blooded American boy has tried that routine in front of 
a mirror with a hairbrush or something like that as a pretend microphone. 
I know I did. But..." Garin said with a long pause and a smile.
 
"But?"
 
"My big brother walked in on me while I was lip-synching a song by 
Prince, dressed in a jock strap and wearing white socks. I love him but 
he wouldn't let me forget that for a long time." Garin laughed and added, 
"I guess that was the first time I realized that I was a little bit of an 
exhibitionist."
 
"So you think I'm an exhibitionist and could be a good dancer?"
 
"To both questions...yes. Dancing you can learn and it'll be hard work if 
we make a deal. The other part is simple. I hope you don't mind me 
getting personal and frank?"
 
"Ah, no...fire away."
 
"Your body is really prime and well-developed; it's pretty obvious taking 
care of yourself is important to you. That's why I thought you were a few 
years older when we first talked. And take no offense when I say that 
dick of yours makes quite an impression."
 
"That is something I didn't work on...well, except for..."
 
"I understand," Garin said with a chuckle. "I've noticed the grace in your 
movements when you walk around the gym. The bottom line is your smile 
and sense of humor. It's quite a package, if I could use the term loosely. 
You have the potential to be a popular dancer and entertainer."
 
"You're always looking for talent?"
 
"Off and on. One of our favorites is leaving Chicago. He graduated last 
summer and the bank he works for is transferring him to London in a few 
months. I need a preppy college-type to replace him."
 
Banker? College-type? Wow, my head is spinning."
 
"Most of the guys have full-time day jobs or are in school. For instance, I 
sell real estate in addition to overseeing the night business. There's a full-
time office manager at Studz Barecats who handles all the bookings and 
accounting. Age-wise, we range from 19 to the old man - me," Garin 
punched Jeremy's arm lightly and grinned. "By old, I mean that the shelf 
life of a dancer is limited. I've got maybe two years left before I hang up 
the thong. Let's face it; we are really just a piece of meat in the eyes of 
the ladies...and sometimes the guys."
 
"Guys? I thought..."
 
"We do gay gigs occasionally. Believe me, the gay audiences are much 
looser with tips and a lot of fun." Garin paused and looked at Jeremy. "I 
guess I need to back up a minute. Here's the deal. On weekends we 
always perform at the Studz Club downtown - one show on Friday and 
two shows on Saturday. It's an old warehouse that we re-designed with a 
long runway running off the stage. We've got a cast of eight dancers and 
the base pay per show is a hundred bucks per dancer. Private parties 
pay even better. And even with travel time, make-up and everything 
before and after...it's only four hours of your time on Friday and maybe 
seven hours on Saturday." Garin stabbed another piece of bread and 
said, "Jump in and help me finish the fondue."
 
"So we're talking about twenty-five bucks an hour?" The initial money 
being bantered about blew Jeremy away. 'Christ, I could rack up a nice 
savings account in addition to handling the expenses,' he figured. He 
dragged bread around the cheese and pondered what had been said.
 
"It is good money. But I'm very demanding and not many guys have the 
looks, build and talent to do what we do."
 
"Beats seven bucks an hour at Bally's."
 
"The base pay is just for openers. Here's the way the show operates. 
Except for the opening and closing dance with the ensemble, each guy 
comes out in a different costume - in his character - twice during the 
performance. It's the tips that really rack up."
 
"Tips? I've seen pictures of the audience stuffing dollar bills into the 
dancer's, um, thong. Is that what happens?"
 
"Very good, Mr. Sloan. That's exactly what happens. I'm not going to 
paint a picture of everything being all roses. Some of the audiences are 
really cheap and ya gotta look out for a woman's fingernails...they can get 
nasty in the frenzy of grabbing at a guy," Garin said with a laugh. 
"Copping a feel is part of the deal and most of the gals just play along 
with the fun. You know, she's not expecting much more than a smile if 
there's just a buck she wants to tuck into your thong. However, a five 
spot is usually a ticket to linger a little. Ten bucks...well, things can get 
interesting. If a twenty-dollar bill comes out, the tipper expects to slip it in 
the front of the thong and let their fingers travel down a little. You need to 
study the women while you're dancing because there is the potential of 
getting a little rough when you come out for encores and tips."
 
"Rough? You mean they might attack you?"
 
"Some gals just get carried away and become too aggressive. You've got 
to watch out for long nails,' Garin said with a chuckle. "But I've got two 
security men - buffed out dudes that are built like brick shit houses that 
are there for crowd control. The whole idea is for everyone to have a lot 
of fun. Interestingly enough, when we do the show for men, there are 
generally no problems and the tips are much better. The guys have a 
better respect for the plumbing and several are more interested in a 
dancer's backside."
 
"Guess I'd have a lot to learn to fit in to the group," Jeremy replied.
 
"It's all about training. If you join us, you'll be up to your eyeballs in 
working out with our choreographer - the dance coach - to learn all the 
routines and perfect your own act. This will require a commitment from 
you a couple of nights a week and Saturday mornings. During this period 
you'll be paid ten dollars an hour."
 
"Would I have to leave my Bally's job? Having a free membership is a 
great deal."
 
"Just cut down your schedule to three days. Those workouts are a 
requirement for a job with us.' 
 
"I can do that. As long as the training doesn't interfere with my school and 
jobs around the house."
 
That's cool. And there is a great payoff after you're ready. Once you get 
the hang of the moves and how to work the crowd, you should be able to 
at least double the money. It's like going to a restaurant; a guest tips for 
good service. The better the show, the better the tips. And the private 
parties are even better. But I don't want to discuss that part of the 
deal...if you join us you won't be working parties for a while. You'll find 
out soon enough that life's a grind...on the stage. But that isn't so bad. 
The challenge is to come on the stage each night with the enthusiasm like 
it's your first night."
 
"Why not private parties?"
 
"You need a little seasoning for those bookings. Entertaining in a private 
home is completely different where the law is concerned. Let's just say 
that as long as no sex is involved, the book is pretty open, the dancing 
can get pretty wild and thongs sometimes have been known to come off if 
the tips are big enough."
 
"Sex is considered what?" Jeremy asked with a raised eyebrow and grin. 
"I mean, I know what sex is...but..."
 
"Relax. You're a little old for a 'birds and bees' lecture," Garin laughed 
and continued, "In this case it's anything that involves penetration of the 
client...or being penetrated by the client if you're working a stag party. If 
you were to be part of our group, I wouldn't send you out on a private 
gig for the first six months. By the way, on private gigs we always work in 
pairs. It's a better show, offers crowd control and assures personal 
security. Plus, we always check references before we accept a party." 
Garin finished his glass of wine and sat back in his chair. "I think I've had 
my fill. How about you."
 
"This was just enough and I really appreciate getting educated about 
fondue. Man, I'm getting pretty sophisticated for someone my age," 
Jeremy said. "So if I'm interested, where do we go from here?"
 
"First, is there interest?"
 
"I'd want to think it over and maybe discuss it with a good friend. But as 
long as I'm not breaking any laws and it's not harmful...it might be a good 
way to pay for my college years, give Mom the money she needs to get 
along and let me have some cushion for a separate life."
 
"Just so you know, I need a decision in a couple of days or the offer's off 
the table. I need to have a trained, groomed dancer by the end of 
March."
 
"Groomed?"
 
"Yeah, there are some things we need to take care of. You may not have 
noticed, but I've got my hair down there trimmed...and balls shaved," 
Garin said with a shrug. "Your image will be developed to your character. 
That includes all hair kept off your chest, legs, butt and a few other areas 
in the crotch."
 
"Christ, I don't even shave my face very often. But I get the idea." Jeremy 
sipped the remainder of his drink and reflected on what was involved 
with this job. 'As a matter of fact, I remember noticing that Garin had 
done something to himself down there,' he thought. 'Wow, I wouldn't 
have acknowledged that last week.'
 
"We have a buddy system on shaving. It helps to have someone you trust 
take care of those areas you can't reach very well. And if you're living at 
home without a lot of privacy, it's great to do it someplace else."
 
"Garin, if I say yes I'll need someone to take me under his wing. I can 
take care of myself but this would be a whole new thing. I'm certainly not 
a prude...it's just something I never expected to be discussing. If you're 
going to be at the gym on Wednesday, can I tell you then?"
 
"Yeah, Wednesday will be fine. As far as someone covering your 
backside and being your official buddy, I've got just the guy in mind. He's 
not that much older than you, has his own apartment and is one of our 
rising stars. In fact, I think he went to your high school a couple of years 
ago."
 
"Would I know him?"
 
"Possibly...but let's not discuss this any further until you've made a 
decision. Oh, just so you know, there's no drugs - pot included - or 
taking money as sex-for-hire at any time. Tattoos are out unless I 
approve them. But being our 'Joe College' character means having a
 clean body without tats."
 
"No problem. Um, Joe College...that'd be my stage name?" Jeremy 
asked.
 
"Yeah...I think that works. I see you coming out in private school clothes, 
frame glasses, a pencil behind your ear...that 'boy next door' sort of thing. 
Gives the audience a great contrast to when you dance your routine and 
show them what you've got. You want any dessert?"
 
"No, the fondue was just enough. Thanks, Garin...this has been a real 
eye-opener of a meeting and you'll have an answer from me on 
Wednesday. Off hand, I think that I like the opportunity."
 
"Great. Let me get the check and we'll get outta here." Garin flagged the 
waiter and gave him a credit card. Within moments the check arrived and 
it was settled with a nice tip.
 
Jeremy gave directions to his home and mulled over the conversation. 
'This would really be a major change in my life...along with the other 
thing.'
 
______________________
  
TO BE CONTINUED

ジャック・スクライブ

 

いつもと同じだよ。18歳以下の人は読んじゃ駄目。

 

 

ドリューに。俺のストーリーをチェックしてくれたり、コメントくれたりしてありがとう。辛抱強く間違いをチェックしてくれたブラッドにも感謝。最後に、俺のストーリーを「これでよし。」ってなるまで弄ってくれたトラッブ(作者:多分トラビスのニックネーム)に!

 

(作者注: shout-outっていうのは、TVなんかでカメラに向かって友達の名前を言って手を振ったりするあの感じ?訳しにくくてごめん。)

 

コメントは大歓迎だよ。 jack.scribe@gmail.com

 

 

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第五章、新しいバイト

 

 

日曜日の朝、ジェレミーとロバートは、7時間前にした行為の続きを始めた。そしてタイとマニーが帰った後、そのことについて少し話した。二人とも後悔したり、罪悪感を感じたりしていなかった。そして、まるでずっと押さえつけ、否定してきた重石が外れたみたいに感じていた。でも何を否定してきたんだろう?ロバートの両親がまた出かける予定だったから、そのことについては次の週末にもう少し話そうって決めた。今、二人の若者には、自分達が大人になるための大きな一歩を踏み出したっていうことが分かっていた。

 

 

クリスマス休暇の前の最後の週で、ジェレミーは誰かに相談できるまで、自己分析はお預けにしようって決めていた。男性ホルモンで一杯の、楽しみを追求するのに貪欲な若者達の間で忘れられていた過去が繰り返され、ロバートとしたことを完全に楽しんだって認めたことで、ジェレミーは随分気が楽になった。と言っても、ジェレミーにはそれがただ「やった」ってことだけじゃないって分かっていた。

 

自分の気持ちに気づくと、毎日の生活の中で自分が他の男達をどんな風に見ていたのか自覚させられた。男達に欲情した目で見られるたびに、密かに空想を掻き立てられた。男が前を歩く時に見える、引き締まったお尻、タイトなジーンズが盛り上がった股間の形を見せ付ける、下着を履いてなければ尚更いい。バイセプを強調する袖のないシャツから腋毛が覗き、引き締まった腹筋から下半身に走る毛の跡。そういうちょっとした誘われるような光景は、ジムだともっと顕著になった。一番誘惑が多いのはロッカーとかシャワーだって、今になってジェレミーは理解した。色んな魅力的な男達が服を脱ぎかけていたり、裸だったりするのは、凄く刺激的だってことを。

 

その一方で、ジェレミーは女の子といるのも好きだった。“女の子じゃなくって、もう女性って思うべきかも。”そう考えた。“僕だって後5週間で正式に大人になるんだし。”ジェレミーは女の子と付き合うことの楽しさも、不満も経験していた。5年の間に付き合った何人かの女の子とは、いつも数ヶ月で終わってしまったけど、何人かの女の子を除くと、ジェレミーはその子達全員とセックスの経験があった。“そして、バージンっていうのは一人だけ。”だけど、女の子達を「ただのお尻」っていう風に片付けたくはなかった。それって失礼だし。だけど、女の子と付き合うっていうのは、友達に認められて受け入れられる形で、男としての狩りの本能を満足させるための、単なる方法にすぎなかったんだろうって、今は思えた。

 

 

それからギャリン・マクマナスっていう謎めいた男の問題もあった。“ビッグ・スマイル会社ってなんだろう?」シャワーを浴びたばかりの身体にユニフォームのシャツを着ながら考えた。”今夜、夕食に会えば分かることだよな。“時計を見ると、仕事を始める前にまだ15分あった。ジムの方に戻りながら、ジェレミーはザックに自分の話を聞いてくれる時間があればいいのにと思った。

 

 

月曜日はいつもより忙しくて、ジオは顧客と話をしていたけど、ザックの姿が見つからなくてがっかりした。でも、何かのマニュアルを呼んでいるブロンドのトレイナーを見つけると、ホッとした。「ザック、少し時間ある?」ジェレミーはザックの方に向かって歩きながら大声で言った。“ザックとジオは上手く言ってるのかな?”

 

「実はあんまり時間がないんだ。ACE資格をオンラインで更新しないといけなくてね。どうかしたのかい?なんだかこの世の重荷を肩に背負い込んでるって顔してるよ。」

 

 

「ちょっと個人的なことで相談したかったんだけど。僕の深い悩み事に巻き込んでもいいかな?」ジェレミーがニヤッと笑って言った。「今週中に聞いてもらいたいことがあって。兄貴として相談に乗ってくれると本当に嬉しいんだけど。」

 

 

「喜んで相談に乗るよ…弟君。今夜じゃどう?」

 

 

「うーん…今夜は外せないプランがあるんだ。明日、僕のバイトの前に会えないかな?」

 

 

「アポを調べてみよう。」ザックはバインダーを開いて、スケジュールをチェックした。「えーっと、4時はどう?その時間に終わるセッションがあって、その後は5時半まで空いてるんだ。」

 

 

「いいね。じゃあ下のデリでどう?」

 

 

「その時間に予約が入らないようにしとくよ。じゃあその時に。」ザックは立ち上がると手を差し出した。

 

 

ジェレミーはその手を握ると、受付に向かった。いつもの様に仕事を始めると、メンバーを助けたり、電話に出たり、立ち寄った顧客の相手をしないでいい時は、ピートと冗談を言い合った。ピートのゲイ的な誘いを込めた、大胆なからかいが、新しい意味を持ち始めた。ピートが2重の意味を込めた冗談でふざけかかるたびに、ジェレミーは新しく捻りを加えて直ぐにやり返した。“へえ、これって結構楽しいな。”そう思った。“ちょっと危ないくらいなのが面白いや。”

 

 

「ダーリン、君、今夜はすごいね。一体この素敵にはじけた新しい人格はどっから来たの?」ピートはメンバーをチェック・インさせた後で話しかけた。「今までどこに隠れてたのさ。」

 

 

「僕だって聞いてるだけじゃつまんないからね。君ばっかり僕をからかって楽しむなんて不公平だもん。」ジェレミーは、もうちょっとでピートに“ねえ彼女”って呼びかけるところだった。おじさんの世界のゲイならそういう言い方をするとこだけど、それはやりすぎかなって思った。ちょっとだけゲイっぽく冗談を言ってみたりするだけで、ジェレミーは今のところ満足してた。“それに僕、いかにもソレっぽいって感じじゃないし。”

 

 

「何があったかしらないけど…新しいジェレミー・スローンは好きだよ。感じが良くて、イケてて、ユーモアのセンスもあるなんてね。僕が思うに…。」受付に向かって歩いてくる男をジェレミーがジッと見ているのに気がつくと、ピートは話すのを止めた。

 

 

「こんばんは、ギャリン。」ギャリンのカードを受け取ってチェックインするとジェレミーは言った。“彼、カッコいいよね。”自分がゲイだからそう思うのか、それが事実だからなのか自分でもよく分からない。ギャリンはすごくハンサムだった。

 

 

「やあ、ジェレミー。」ギャリンが笑って、ピートにも頷きかけた。

 

 

「ピート、こちらギャリン…マクマナスさん、知ってる?」ジェレミーはカードを返すと微笑んだ。“カッコいいっていうんじゃなくて、すごいイケてる、かな?”

 

 

「ああ…もちろん。ハイ、ギャリン。ワークアウト楽しんでね。」ピートは受付のマニュアルに載ってるみたいに、視線を逸らさない完璧な笑顔で応対した。

 

 

「今夜のディナーは大丈夫?」

 

 

「もちろん。お腹も空いてるし。」ジェレミーは笑顔で答えた。

 

 

「よかった。9時に受付で。それから一緒に出かけよう。」

 

 

「ピート、俺、着替えられるように15分早く終わってもいいかな?」ジェレミーは時計を見て、まだ7時だってことに気がついた。

 

 

「その時間なら今夜は空いてるだろうから、どうぞ。楽しんできてよ。」ピートが肩を竦めると、ジェレミーにだけ見えるように目をクルッと回して見せた。

 

 

「じゃあ9時でいいです。ここにいますから。」

 

 

「ローディング・ゾーンに停めてある黒いリンカーン・ナビゲーターだから。じゃあ後で。」ギャリンは二人に手を振ると、ロッカー・ルームの方に歩いていった。

 

 

「ははあ、面白そうなことになってない?」ピートは大げさに手振りをつけて言った。「一体どういうこと?」

 

 

「貧乏で飢え死にしそうな学生に奢ってくれる、それだけだよ。」

 

 

「それでもって、すっごく素敵な学生にね。やれやれ、なんて勿体ない。すっごくイケてるストレートが二人でデートなんて。僕はどこで順番待ちしてれば入れてもらえるのかな?」ピートがニヤニヤ笑って聞いた。

 

 

「がっかりさせてわるいけどね。僕らは友達なだけ。君を刺激するような話じゃなくて悪かったね。」

 

 

「刺激して欲しいのは一箇所だけ…」

 

 

「それ以上聞きたくないよ。そういうことは言わないで…君に問題あるんだから。」ジェレミーはクスクス笑いながら言った。「でももし我慢できないなら、手で君自身を包んで…」

 

「はいはい。分かったよ。どうせまた相手を探して通りをうろつく破目になりそう…」ピートはコンピューターの画面を見ながら、付け加えた。「でもこのギャリン・J・マクマナスさんが相手を探してるっていうなら、俺の名前を教えてあげてね。」ピートはそう言うと、唇を突き出して、ジェレミーに投げキスを送った。

 

 

「君のアレをちょん切って、胸をつけたら…そしたら興味を持ってくれるかもね。」鳴り出した電話を掴む前に、ピートの背中を叩いた。

 

 

次の1時間半は何事もなく過ぎた。忙しすぎてバタバタすることはなかったけど、二人が暇でない程度に受付に人がやって来た。845分には、ロッカー・ルームに戻って着替え、その夜のディナーに出かける準備を始